Showing posts with label dreams. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dreams. Show all posts

Tuesday, December 3, 2019

9. How To Be Gentle with Yourself - "Living in Light" Series

We all know we can run ourselves ragged, especially around the holidays. We already had a million things to do, and now we have a million more. One thing I've learned is that you have to go easy on yourself. It's easy to want to be a people pleaser and even a self-pleaser, feeling like if we don't finish our to-do lists, goals, dreams, we're less than and we don't measure up.

But here's the thing, the more we beat ourselves up over these things, isn't going to get us any faster towards our goals! If anything it can cause more self-doubt, disappointment, mental exhaustion, and worse, us just giving up. We have to be more gentle with ourselves, take off the pressure and just do the best we can (not more than our best) so we can fully enjoy life and just be happier!

Who doesn't want more happiness?

One thing is to set realistic goals. Ask yourself, what can I realistically get done today? And even if you can't finish that list, don't beat yourself up over it~ embrace the fact that there is only so much time during each day. Only so much energy you have.

Tell yourself constantly that you're doing your best. This will reinforce your positive attitude toward yourself.

Tell yourself, just because I couldn't finish this today, doesn't mean I won't ever finish it. You will start to feel the weight on your shoulders lift, I promise you.

Next is the importance of boundaries. You can have a ton of people pulling you in different directions, from family to bosses. Their demands may be too demanding and their expectations of you may be too high. I'm telling you that's their problem and not yours.

If you're truly doing your best then that's all you can do. Make it clear to yourself and everyone else that you're doing what you can. It doesn't mean you don't love your family or your job, but you can't give other people control over your life.

Your happiness is going to be because of your choices, not theirs. 

Thirdly, give yourself a break. I highly recommend daily breaks, weekly breaks, and even doing something just for yourself once a month. Taking time to just be with yourself doing something that you love. Something that helps restore your mind, body, and soul.

It could be something like taking frequent 5-minute mental breaks when you're at work. Taking a bubble bath once a week. Even getting a spa treatment once a month to get away for a bit. (You can so tell I'm a girl! Men, I'm sure you can think of some things that would help you restore too!)

Whatever it is, take some time for yourself. You deserve it. 

Most importantly, we need to be easier on ourselves. It's no wonder stress is the number one reason for all our health problems. We need to learn how to downgrade. Shift into neutral and coast sometimes. Never lose sight of your goals and dreams, but remember life is about the journey.

If we're not happy when we're chasing our dreams, then what's the point of having dreams at all?

We all have these ideal visions of ourselves. Our "perfect self" finishes all to-do lists with ease and grace. We look "perfect" all the time. We can "please" every family member, every friend, our boss, effortlessly, and all without struggle. Does this sound familiar? Constantly comparing ourselves to our "perfect self" will only cause more unhappiness.

Don't judge yourself. We live in a society that thrives on the criticism of others. Don't fall prey to that way of thinking. Especially when it comes to judging yourself! The more we over-analyze ourselves and others, the more we create distance and negativity. Just as one should try to find the good in others, we should be constantly searching for the good in ourselves.

Embrace who you are right now, imperfections and all. Set realistic goals. Know your boundaries and limits. And take regular breaks from the hustle and bustle!

Be gentle with yourself. I promise you, you'll have a happier journey & you'll truly begin living in light!

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And remember, Jo may know better, but God knows best! Ask Him for guidance and He will never lead you astray. Amen.

Saturday, July 17, 2010

Cruel, Harsh, Brutal, Dry Hollywood

A wanna be, gotta be, gonna be feature film screenwriter. That's me.

I had my first cold pitch to an agent on Thursday. Talk about a stereotypical conversation with one of Hollywood's finest. Brutal. Blunt. To the point.

"Sounds cliche." "Sounds expensive." I can soundly and quickly answer. "Yes." and "Yes."

But all factual dominance aside... what movie isn't cliche to a certain extent? What movie isn't that expensive? I've been told my entire screenwriting career... Hollywood is a clone factory. You can't be too original. It's too risky! And... movies cost millions of dollars! I don't know for any one person a couple mil was ever cheap.

So I agree with the agent. You ARE right. Okay, so now what?

"Well, I 'd still like to read it." Success. Objective complete. Then... "call me in a week."

Thank you so much for giving me the time of day from your hectic, crazed, money driven schedule to talk to an amateur like me. Yes, your excellency. Write a novel first to establish a fan base? You got it. However, I'm really a screenwriter and didn't really want to be the next J.K. Rowling, but whatever you say. Jump through a hoop of fire for your entertainment? Of course I will!!

But all kidding aside... I knew selling my first script would be exactly like this. Harsh. Painful. Rejections galore. And I'm sure as it continues, I'll just get more used to it.

The point is, it's all worth it. To be your dreams come true. Sitting on the highest cloud amidst the world of chaos below. Feeling the true meaning of success rattle through your core. Seek and you shall find. Find that person that believes in you as much as you believe in yourself.

They're out there. I can feel it.